Insert heavy sigh..

What I speak to the stars is between their glimmer and me.
What I cast into the night is our secret to keep.
What I cannot say for fear of breaking my own heart,
is for the endless reams of crumpled paper to feel.

Goodbye, Farewell..

The heat is oppressive and the weather is desultory, making us restless. It doesn't feel like home inside the Studio anymore. Not like the way it used to. Nothing pulls us back to the doors, telling us to stay. It seems like we're lying in wait, to shut those doors and never look back. This is not the way it was supposed to end. No, nobody would have imagined it like this.

These are the last days of our college life. It should have been beautiful, with us reminiscing and becoming nostalgic. We should have been making plans for the future, ways to spend more time together after we've left. Only now we bicker and mourn over the loss of time and precious memories that we could have been creating. Frustration has replaced the tinge of sadness that permeates through our moods at the end of three wonderful years. For we are crying still, only we know it is not love that fuels our tears. The winds of change betray us at every step.

We wanted to step out gracefully, with time slowly fading our memories away. Fate has different plans for us, plans that make us trip and fall on our way out. We have fallen on our faces and never once been picked back up with care. All our fragility has been forgotten, replaced by hard hearts and attitudes. Is this what a farewell truly feels like, as if you weren't even wanted in the first place?

Our time as students has all but left us exhausted, in certain ways. For each other, for the times we shared, we'll do it all over again. At least that is what we say to assure ourselves that we will pick up where we left off. There is one heartstring that knows better, we would not want to go through the last few months again.

#Lesson for today: It's time to leave. Whether we want to or not. I only wish it would have been a fond memory.