5.23.2009

Cricket: Evolutions

We started with Test Cricket. Five whole days of *non-stop* fun. If you had not much else to do, that is.

We graduated to ODI's. Faster, funner and with the added ability for us to distinguish between the teams. Though, I presume that's simply because colour televisions became all the rage.

After many many years of decreasing attention spans and IQ levels, we received with much pomp & splendor, the form of Twenty-Twenty Cricket. Only three hours required as compared to the laborious 7 otherwise. Apparently watching Football, only an hour and a half long is out of the question.

And give it 10 more years and we'll simply have the Coin Toss Cricket! Buuutt. It needs to be interesting, right? Thus the team will consist of:
1. The Captain
2. A weather guy, to ensure that the winds are in favour.
3. A statistician, to point out the law of averages.
4. A cynic, to point out Murphy's Law.
5. A body-builder, to make sure the captain's thumb is in good flicking order.
6. A scientist, to make sure the aerodynamics of the stadium are just right.
7. A video - analyst, to explain in Slo-Mo what went wrong.
And finally,
8. A voo-doo person cum coin collecter, to make sure the coin is well prepared.

#Lesson for today: Yes, I don't like 20-20 cricket all that much, I'm still rooting for the ODI's.

5.20.2009

Caterpillars, Cocoons, Butterflies

Things that I didn't think were possible:

1. Me listening to Gangsta' Rap by someone known as Pitbull

2. Me developing a parallel love-hate relationship with Facebook. I was just gushing about it to my facebook-challenged friend a few days before. I believe this has something to do with the fact that every five seconds it has been updating itself with the same feeds. My homepage resembles a gramophone with the pin stuck.

3. Me being good at poker. I suck at pulling bluffs, keeping money with me is not a strong point and I still don't know what a royal flush is. I have a sneaking suspicion it's nothing more than the Queen's jewel-encrusted Flush.

4. Bob Dylan to have gotten even better than ever before with his latest album.

5. The Bro Code.

6. Sex while windsurfing. Thanks for ruining my mental imagery of water sports as merely water sports, Enrique. I'll be there when you come to India, bottle of acid in hand.

#Lesson for today: Delhi is hot. Very hot.

5.14.2009

Back!

Hello Children, I'm back.

For all those who missed me (:D), college holidays started and my brains went into a temporary decline. After two weeks of lolling around on the bed and drooling on the pillow, I think they've jump started right back. Thank you Subnormality, you are the baap of all comics.

On a different note, I realized exactly why wearing tight jeans and off-shoulder tops combined with dating a single person is so against Indian Culture. All those Sena people were so right.

While watching the video for "Jiya Jale" last night, I figured, So this is what Indian Culture is all about!! You wear extremely short blouses that barely contain your breasts, showing off your midriff to all and sundry. You don't wear tight jeans, you wear tiny shorts that cling to you after you have been skinny dipping in water with an equally naked SRK and about twenty other men. And also, you dance in waterfalls while those twenty men leer at you and then you proceed to shamelessly dry hump SRK in the water. All this time, SRK is in love with your sister or something and yet continues to dry hump you, this time amidst twenty under clad women.

Then of course, you could be an item girl. You are paid to gyrate on the silver screen in an open courtyard. But this is all acceptable as long as you are not in a pub or anything. Because drinking desi daaru in front of a collection of leering louts is more cultured than drinking cocktails with your boyfriend. As is obvious, those drunk louts are more gentlemanly than your average sweet city boy can be. This girls and boys, is the true Indian Culture. Learn to appreciate it.

#Lesson for today: Gyrating shamelessly isn't against our culture. Merely dancing peacefully, is.

5.03.2009

About being human

Just when you've done your bit for society and the ones who live on the fringes of it, feeling human and so proud of yourself, you go and fall in love with cyanide and happiness.

http://www.explosm.net/comics/352/

#Lesson for today: I actually thought that I'm no longer a full-on cynic. Sad.